Whatchu Girl Talkin' 'Bout?

Well, as it turns out I survived Girl Talk! Yay! That's not saying that I almost died in the process. So, I was sick from the get-go, and when I get there what do I do? I start drinking. Of course. It's a concert. How can you NOT drink at a concert. Anywho, After a pitcher or two the first opening act finally came on stage half an hour late. A band called Krak Attack. Two muscular colored gentlemen obviously in love with each other and can't face the facts. All of their songs are about girl's bootys when I think in fact they are secretly about their desires for each other's bootys. On all three screens it was nothing but big girls bending over with exposed crackular linings, and of course them jumping around on stage like monkeys. Then they called about 15 girls on stage to expose their cracks to the audience. It was at this point that I stepped outside because I couldn't take it anymore.

After coming back inside. We waited another forty minutes for a set change. That's right forty minutes! Now, we aren't talking about setting up sound for and instruments for an 8 man band. The following band, The Death Set, was two kids with guitars, and a guy with a 5 piece drum kit. Their name was appropriate though because I actually wanted to kill anyone who got in my way of leaving the venue so I wouldn't have to be assaulted by what they considered music. Essentially, if you did a lot of crack, copped an attitude like The Hives, and then played a song, and then played your instruments quite horribly over the popular song you would have a rough estimation of what The Death Set sounds like.

Another twenty minutes or so pass, and I exchange words about my MST3K jacket with about three of four other gents. Then Girl Talk came on stage. A scrawny little white guy with long brown hair, a beard, and a headband. He walked up to his mixer, and went to town. Right as he started everyone went nuts. The whole place was literally hopping. He started letting everyone up on stage too. All through out the show I kept watching all the girls try to cozy up to him, and the huge bodyguard that stood next to him with his arm exposed in a vein attempt to protect him from the clammering females.

Needless to say, everyone lost about 10 pounds throughout the course of his set. My brother, Brad, befriended a little adorable girl, and then they snuck off somewhere. Then five minutes later I see them both up on stage with the bopping masses. When I talked to him later, apparently, she sweet talked the guard to get them in, and then as soon as they were up there she went loco and started screaming at Brad about something. So, he let her go, and enjoyed his stay up there.

About an hour in, I think, some of the equipment busted, and there was a recess to fix it. Then he was going back on stage. It was at that point we decided to leave. My body was starting to feel the pain from the drinks, the dehydration, the few smokes, I had, and the sickness. My brother stayed for the rest of the set, and I heard it was good. Molly and I went home, got Steak N Shake, ate it, felt horrible, and then fell asleep.

All in all, Girl Talk is awesome. However, not necessarily the most impressive in concert. Sure, he spun his mixes in non-album order, but there wasn't anything particularly great about the live show other then throbbing and gasping for air while bouncing back-to-back with everyone else there.